All the single ladies! At church.

Lexington Presbyterian Church

Image by J. Stephen Conn via Flickr

CNN is now asking if African American church-going women are single because they go to church.

Cooper, a writer for the San Francisco Examiner, recently made claims on her blog SurvivingDating.com that predominantly black protestant churches, such as African Methodists, Pentecostal, and certain denominations of Evangelical and Baptist churches are the main reason black women are single. Cooper, who is black and says she is not strictly religious, argues that rigid beliefs constructed by the black church are blinding black women in their search for love.

Apparently, “If they meet a black man that is not in church, they are automatically eliminated as a potential suitor. This is just limiting their dating pool.”

Yeah, you know what’s really bad? Wanting to date someone who shares your values. Only wanting to be in a relationship with someone who understands your connection with god, with someone who not only doesn’t mind that you go to church very frequently, but wants to be a part of that aspect of your life.

Orthodox Jews often choose to date only other Jews. Hell, reform Jews often choose to date only other Jews. Plenty of Catholics, Hindus, and Protestants of all stripes have told me that they would only date people within their religions, or that they would date people outside of their religions but only ultimately marry someone with it.

“Cooper says her goal is to empower black women. If their strategy for meeting men is failing, Cooper offers two suggestions: Find another church or leave-and go where the boys go: tailgates, bars and clubs.”

I agree: if you can’t find a man to marry who shares your values, you should dump your values and go find MANLY MEN. WHO ARE ALWAYS DRINKING. AT BARS.

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Because…chess?

A League of Their OwnIf we let them play baseball, this movie wouldn’t have happened!

Remember when I talked about feminism in science? (It’s okay, no one else read that post either, according to my stats.) Remember how I said that people aren’t robots, and that arbitrarily picking one trait on which to divide us is not going to produce perfect results?

I often wonder what this means for athletics. Fielding two different teams – one for men and one for women – is, on some level, frustrating to me. Going to Georgetown basketball games at the Verizon Center, where the men play, and McDonough Gym, where the women play, is like going to watch two entirely different sports. Women are usually shorter, so women’s basketball tends to use more strategy and intelligence in the game.

Then you get giants like Brittney Griner. Check out these stats I unabashedly pulled from Wikipedia:

Griner recorded one of the first women’s collegiate dunks[7] November 24, 2009, against Jacksonville State.[8]

On December 16, 2009, Griner recorded Baylor’s first triple-double[9] with 34 points, 13 rebounds, and Big 12 Conference record 11 blocked shots. The 34 points and 11 blocks were career highs.

On March 22, Griner set an NCAA tournament record with 14 blocked shots in a 49-33 win against the Georgetown Hoyas.[12]

On March 29, Griner led the Lady Bears to the Final Four. In that game, in which Baylor defeated Duke 51-48, Griner blocked nine shots, totaling 35 for the tournament, a new NCAA Women’s Tournament record.[13]

I italicized the game against Georgetown (sad face) because I’m pretty sure that game is the pinnacle of “individual variation” in women’s basketball. BRITTNEY GRINER IS 6’8”. NONE OF OUR BRILLIANT, INTELLIGENT, CLEVER PLAYS ARE GOING TO WORK AGAINST A GIRL WHO IS SEVEN FEEL TALL. WE WERE CLOBBERED. I CRIED.

Anyway.

Brittney Griner, in women’s basketball, barely needs to do anything but stand there. She does a lot more, but she doesn’t need to. This girl is taller than half of Georgetown’s men’s team, and is definitely as good as a lot of them. She definitely surpasses a lot of the talent on the Baylor men’s team (in my humble, incredibly biased anti-Bears opinion). She would be a great contribution to a team of tall players. But she can’t play with them. That pesky vagina of hers apparently gets in the way.

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Sometimes, It’s Okay To Stay in Sports

Don't change topics.

This is the greatest sport ever. Do not ever change topics, Seth Davis. Ever.

In a recent article for his his Sports Illustrated column “Hoop Thoughts,” Seth Davis wrote:

Look, I am not here to defend Pitino’s behavior. Over the last 16 months, he was revealed to be to be a lot of things — a fool, a cad, a liar, an adulterer and an egotist. In other words, a sinner.

For those of you who don’t follow college basketball, let me fill you in: Rick Pitino is the coach everyone loves to hate (Hoya Saxa). Recently, his “mistress,” or whatever the hell she was, was charged with extortion because she tried to get money out of him. It is unclear whether or not she was extorting him for sleeping with her consensually or because he raped her. The woman, Karen Cunagin Sypher, has now been convicted of extortion. She is the now the criminal.

Let me share with you a few snippets of why Pitino is the “real victim” here, and he did not commit a crime, according to Seth Davis:

She says Pitino raped her twice, yet she waited six years to confront him about it.

Although the alleged assaults occurred in April 2003, Sypher didn’t file a criminal complaint against Pitino until November 2009, three months after he revealed her alleged extortion attempts to the police and the media, and three months after she was indicted.

She claimed Pitino raped her, yet she met him a few weeks later at the apartment of his equipment manager, Tim Sypher. Pitino gave her $3,000. (The coach says it was for medical insurance, but Sypher used it for an abortion.) Then, she alleges, he raped her a second time while Tim stayed upstairs and did nothing to help her.

She says Pitino raped her twice and that Tim did nothing to help the second time. Yet, eight months later she married Tim Sypher in Nantucket, Mass.

She claimed Pitino raped her that fateful night at Porcini restaurant in Louisville in August 2003. Yet, she allowed him to drive her home later that night. (Pitino denied ever raping Sypher and authorities found no merit to the charges.)

In the interest of full disclosure, I changed the order of the bullets for more shock value. But these are all things Davis says. Check out the article to confirm, if you’d like.

Let’s go through each reason Rick Pitino is a “victim,” one at a time, and calmly (HA) explain to Seth Davis why he should only be writing about basketball – and not about moral integrity, the law, or rape.

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Women: Because SOMEONE Has to Kill the Monstrosity on My Wall (a stream of consciousness about gender roles)

This is actually a stream of consciousness. Read at your own risk. And don’t forget to check back this week as I write on an actual topic: why Seth Davis should just stick to sports.

Last night, when I got out of the shower, I walked back into my room and saw the biggest creepy crawly thing I have ever fucking seen on the wall above my bed. I’m usually pretty okay with bugs. I hate bees, but who doesn’t? House flies terrify me because of the buzzing, but I’m fully aware that they’re not going to hurt me. Gnats and mosquitos are just an annoyance, and I’ve already proven capable of simply ignoring cockroaches and pretending they are not there.

No, this thing was like, the size of my head.

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The Case Against Cankles

Tonight, I spent five minutes analyzing the place where my calf meets my foot. It’s called the ankle, and it’s a joint, which I’ve confirmed thanks to a two-second Wikipedia search (sorry, mom).

I couldn’t figure out, for the first four-and-a-half minutes, why I was so obsessed with the joint. I kept bending it and looking at it. Okay, it’s my foot. Great.

Then I remembered. It’s thanks to this little gem, Vox Populi’s Twuesday Tweetacular:

"[Twitterer] saw something at Yates that he couldn’t unsee.”

The tagline?

“[Twitterer] saw something at Yates that he couldn’t unsee.”

I didn’t even know what cankles were until four-ish months ago, when a friend kindly informed me that she had them. Apparently, cankles are what a woman has when her ankle joint isn’t perfectly defined.

Frankly, I can’t really distinguish between my ankle and my calf, as I determined this evening during my leg analysis. Therefore, I have cankles.

Because I totally needed something else to be wrong with my body.

I’m not criticizing the Georgetown student who wrote this on his Twitter. It’s not my business to criticize what he writes on his private, locked account. It becomes my business to criticize the broader publisher of this information, though. Vox Populi is the blog of The Georgetown Voice and a personal go-to favorite of large portions of campus for quick updates and good procrastination. I was under the impression that the “Twuesday Tweetacular” is supposed to be full of funny Tweets, not Tweets that illustrate what else is wrong with my body.

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Science!

Recently, the New York Times online is just starting to notice that studies about men don’t necessarily give answers to questions about women’s health. GOOD CATCH, NYT. WAY TO STAY ON TOP OF THINGS!

But that’s a post for another day. Right now, I just wanted to mention that feminism isn’t limited to snarky blog posts – instead, you can also have feminism in science!

“There’s nothing wrong with achieving a higher heart rate with exercise, and if you can maintain that, it’s fine,” said Dr. Martha Gulati, a cardiologist and assistant professor of medicine and preventive medicine at Northwestern, who led the study. “But it might be that some women are getting tired and need to stop or slow down because they’re not able to maintain their heart rate at the higher level. But they’ve been using the wrong numbers.”

http://well.blogs.nytimes.com/2010/07/05/recalibrated-formula-eases-womens-workouts/

You hear that?

“There’s nothing wrong with achieving a higher heart rate with exercise…”

Even if she’s a woman. There’s nothing wrong with her! Even a scientist said so!

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A Quick “Thanks”

My last post was a response to other people’s responses about a rape conviction in Israel. Obviously, the conviction and the 18 month jail sentence that accompanied it have been pretty controversial.

I wanted to thank those of you who commented for remaining civil in the face of a very emotional (well, at least for me) topic. That conversation could have quickly turned uncomfortable, and I appreciate that it did not.

Of course, it helps when everyone agrees.

But I was really excited to read the civil discussion that occurred. A lot of relevant arguments were presented calmly, which is always really impressive. And I look forward to reading similar discussions in the future!

So thanks!